How BibleProject changed my faith

I have what I used to call a “boring” testimony. I grew up in a Christian home, was a generally “good” kid, accepted Jesus at 5, baptized at 17, married at 19. When asked to share my testimony, I never knew what say. It felt weird to say that I had been a Christian most of my life right after the testimony of the girl that was saved from a drug addiction, or the guy that met Jesus on the doorsteps of a brothel. What did I have to share that could possibly benefit anyone else? On top of all of my feelings of inadequacy when it came to my Christian walk, I felt like I had peaked spiritually. I had red the Bible all the way through twice over, and just didn’t see what else I could glean from it.

At the age of about 19 I discovered BibleProject. I can’t honestly tell you how, because I don’t remember the first time I heard about them, but somehow I started listening to their podcast, and when I say it changed my faith immediately, I’m not exaggerating. After years of feeling like I was crawling through spiritual mud, knowing all there was to know, my understanding of the Bible, like a piece of glass, shattered with the well-placed tap of a sharpened word. Everything I thought I knew from how the Bible was made to what the stories meant was being challenged. “Genesis 1 and 2 could be two versions of the same story???”, “Humans are like… trees?”, “The Bible had EDITORS?!?”. My perception of the Bible was unfolding into new dimensions I had never even considered. It went from being something I knew I was supposed to read to being something I couldn’t learn about fast enough. For me, being made aware of the fact that I didn’t actually know all there was to know made me hungry to learn.

At 20 I felt like I new Christian. I couldn’t believe how long I had walked in the mire of ignorance, reading and re-reading the same old stories, hoping I would find something new but not knowing how to see it. At this point, my faith became something I was excited about, proud of, and desperate to grow. It was finally something I wanted to nurture because I desired to, not because I knew I was supposed to.

In the last three years I have learned so much from Bible Project, and yet with each podcast, article, or video, I feel like I know ever less than I thought I did. It has been equal parts humbling and empowering.

The hardest people to bring to Jesus are the ones who think they already know him.

Before this pivotal impact on my faith, I had the basic head knowledge down. I knew I was a sinner, that Jesus died to atone for my sins, and that I only had to ask for his gift to make me new. I had accepted him into my heart, but I didn’t really know what that entailed. As a chronic rule-follower, it was easy for me to accept that I should follow the Bible to the best of my ability, read it every day, and pray continually. But my heart just wasn’t in it. From the ages of about 16 to 18 I felt an insurmountable distance between me and God. The Bible said that the Holy Spirit dwells in those who have chosen to follow him, but I couldn’t feel his presence. This didn’t challenge my belief in his existence though. Somehow, I have never doubted God’s existence. It has been something I always accepted instinctually. But experiencing his presence was a foreign language that I couldn’t learn. I spent three years begging him to make himself known to me, to let me feel his presence, or give me some sign that I was doing the right things. Years later I could see how he used that time to give me a desperation for him that I couldn’t have had without feeling the distance so keenly. I’m sure it was this desperation to grow and know Him that led me to BibleProject. That first podcast was like someone pouring ice cold water over me after years of wandering in the desert. It was a shocking, slightly uncomfortable, revitalizing experience.

This post is for the lifelong Christian who hasn’t experienced It yet. The one who wonders why the pastor keeps talking about an “encounter” with Jesus that they haven’t had. The one that hears stories of the life-changing work that Jesus does and wonders why they’re being left out. I want to encourage you to continue to seek him with your head. Your heart will follow. King David’s story starts with him as a young man. Moses was an adult when he killed the Egyptian and his life changed forever. Don’t be discouraged. Philippians 1:6: “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Our testimonies are a lifelong story that culminates in glorification, bowing in worship at the feet of our King, living eternally in the communal relationship he tried to give Adam and Eve.

I realized far too recently that even though I was a “good” kid, and have known about God ever since I could have the ability to do so, without the saving power Jesus’s life, death, and resurrection, we are all at 0. The drug addict, the liar, the proud, and the “good” kid, are all too far away from holiness without Jesus standing in front of them. Every good thing I thought I was before Jesus were him in me. Any kindness I showed, any creativity I displayed, was the goodness of God being displayed in His creation.

I recently got to hear one of the youths in our church youth group giver her testimony. The statement that stood out most to me was this: God doesn’t do ordinary things.

Your salvation was a miracle motivated by passionate love. Don’t be embarrassed by your “boring” testimony, God is using you to further his kingdom and that is not boring.

Romans 5:8 says “But God showed his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

John 3:16: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”